


Peter Nureyev Wears An Absurd Amount Of Lipstick

by LocalNomad



Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Peter loves kissing Juno's face you can't tell me that's not canon, Rita also tells Frannie everything, Rita still doesn't know about Nureyev, also Peter wears too much lipstick, just pure. happiness, no angst yall, trying to get back into writing after a while of writers block so it's bad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-07
Updated: 2019-01-07
Packaged: 2019-10-06 00:10:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17334998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LocalNomad/pseuds/LocalNomad
Summary: Peter snuck into Juno's office and kissed his face too much and now they don't know how to get out of the office without Rita noticing that Juno's face is literally covered in lipstick. This has been a shitty description by me.





	Peter Nureyev Wears An Absurd Amount Of Lipstick

**Author's Note:**

> Umm well thanks yall for clicking this fic. it's 90% dialogue because im just getting back into it. probably badly written and it's real short. I'm tired, enjoy.

        “Nureyev, what the fuck,” Juno said, trying to act surprised as he caught a glimpse of himself in the screen of his extremely old and unused computer. 

 

        “Ah… yes about that... I can’t defend myself. I’m guilty, detective, lock me up,” Peter replied, kissing Juno’s face once again.

 

        In the reflection of the screen, Juno saw himself, his face covered in dozens of lipstick marks while Peter stood behind him, a grin on his red smudged lips. Normally, this wouldn’t be a problem, Juno would just wash off the lipstick and they’d watch a movie or something, maybe have another try at teaching Juno Rangian street poker, that is if they were in Juno’s apartment, which they most certainly weren’t.

 

        “If Rita sees this I won’t hear the end of it for months, Nureyev,” Juno sighed, attempting to rub off the stains but only succeeding in spreading them further.

 

        “Perhaps you could just… walk really fast to out of the building? Or you could say you’re staying late and ask Rita to leave the office before you?” Peter suggested. 

 

        “No, wouldn't work. The only reason Rita is even here this late is because I’m always working late. And it's 10 PM, she definitely won’t leave the office without me.” Juno said. 

 

        “Well, seems you’ve got a dedicated friend and secretary there, Juno.” Peter laughed. 

 

        “Yeah, yeah, don’t remind-”

 

        “MISTA STEEL, I GOTTA GO HOME, THERE’S A SHOW COMING ON IN HALF AN HOUR AND I AIN’T STAYING HERE TO WATCH IT!” Rita yelled from the front desk. 

 

        “Oh my god, Nureyev, she’s gonna come in here any minute.” Juno said in an unnecessarily quiet voice.  

 

        “Juno, we could just sneak out the window.”

 

        “Okay, no, we aren’t doing that to Rita.”

 

        “Fair point, I renounce my idea.”

 

        “MISTA STEEEEL? MISTA STEEL I’M COMIN IN THERE!”

 

        The sound of Rita’s heels approaching the door snapped Juno into action,

 

        “Quick, act natural!” Juno whisper screamed.

 

        “Juno, what even is ‘natural’?”

 

        “I don’t know just-”

 

        Juno was interrupted yet again, this time by Rita opening the door. A silence overtook the room as Rita took in the scene. 

 

        “Oh my god, Mista Steel… You’re havin a thing with Agent Glass and didn’t tell me?!” 

 

        All at once it dawned on Juno that Rita hasn’t heard a single thing about Peter Nureyev (Or Rex Glass) since the case of the murderous mask. And now his secretary thinks he’s having a “thing” with a dark matters agent. 

 

        “Oh my GOD is that his lipstick on your face? Oh well Mista Steel you really shoulda said so! I woulda gone home, I swear I woulda! Well… you boys have fun, I’ll leave you to it, see ya later, Agent Glass.” Rita gathered her things muttering about how “Frannie’s gonna LOVE this” before leaving with a wink. 

 

        As soon as the door closed behind her, Peter burst out in laughter. 

 

        “Juno… You haven’t told her anything?” He continued laughing, stopping only to wipe a tear or two from his eyes. 

 

        “Oh, shut up, let's go home.”

 

\-----

*Two hours later*

 

        “Nureyev, now that she knows, will you stop using the windows to get to my office?”

 

        “No.”

 

        “Damn, I tried.”

**Author's Note:**

> Added that last little segment for fun. Peter likes using windows, and yall can fight me. Also please comment! I shall take any constructive criticism I can get. Comments sustain my life force, just like every writer out there.


End file.
